Over promise - Under deliver

Over promise - under deliver.

I’ve heard it used to describe the scene of so many of our trust crimes. I’ve used it myself regarding maintenance workers, organizations, health care professionals and the esteemed spiritual teacher or three.

But this week in meditation, I heard it differently.

Over promise – under listen.

When I reflect back on the series of disappointments I’ve felt after an over promise, I realize that much of these situations could have been experienced differently, even avoided altogether, if I had tuned in and obliged my own innate intuition. I would have never made the agreement to begin with had I heeded the uncomfortableness when beginning the transaction. If I had acknowledged the red flag waving due to the way they spoke, if I had noticed my own repeated patterns of control, avoidance, or convenience surfacing, then I could have allowed the listening to lead me to transcending an aged pattern. I would have honored the signal reminding...

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We Are All Stoners

In high school English class, we read a short story called The Lottery written by Shirley Jackson. It was first published in The New Yorker in 1948 and is still considered one of the most provoking short stories in American literature. Much of its metaphor was lost on my 1970’s youth but I do remember a sense of foreboding and helplessness when our teacher added a viewing of one of its many film adaptations to our class time.

Its major theme is scapegoating – the action of mob psychology and how people will abandon reason and embrace cruelty if they are a part of a larger group behaving in the same manner. According to Wikipedia, “The story describes a fictional small town in contemporary America which observes an annual ritual known as "the lottery". The purpose of the lottery is to choose a human sacrificial victim to be stoned to death to ensure the community's continued well-being.” In the story, towns people draw slips of paper from a box once a year and...

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Winter Solstice and the Power of Ritual

Ritual has been a part of civilization since the beginning of our primitive existence. What brings it relevance and meaning in our modern world experience is the depth of intention we bring to the activity. This week, as we approach the Winter Solstice in the Northern Hemisphere, we have the opportunity to engage in such a ritual recognizing the astronomical phenomenon of the shortest day and the longest night. So powerfully embedded is the Winter Solstice in past civilizations that monuments such as Stonehenge in England, Chichen Itza in Mexico and The Temple of Karnak in Egypt were erected to bring sacred depth to their respective cultures beliefs around its occurrence. 

These monuments reflect humankind's longing to connect with something powerful in order to be gifted with guidance, in order to be received favorably.

Today, ritual can be less about seeking favor from something external and more about connecting to that guidance within our own selves. Regardless of your...

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The Alchemy of Worry

It’s noisy out there. Divisive and fearful opinions daily sound off like sirens which layer us with worry and a smothering forgetfulness that seems to blanket our innate genius. When we do nothing to filter the noise, then we, as a species, often try and numb it away.

Substance abuse, work addiction and complete avoidance of personal feelings do nothing in transcending stale narratives that only speak of hopelessness and victimization to external powers. But note that the noise that claims how things are worse than they have ever been in human history is untrue.  The above sentences describing modern-day challenges are equally applicable to every past era as they are to the present.

And in spite of the noise, I believe we are actually evolving.

As we continue championing other’s authenticity as well as our own, we experience more and more minorities, women, and disenfranchised turning the volume up through civil engagement and thunderous demands for greater...

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I was recently reminded of a powerful distinction – the difference between change and transformation. With change, I can make a different choice, but, I can always revert back to old behavior. I can change locations yet return to where I began. I can change my mind about a person, but, I can also revert back to thinking about them as I had before.

Change allows for reversals. Transformation does not. 

A butterfly cannot reverse the metamorphosis and shove itself back into the casing of the caterpillar. An oak cannot be reduced back into the acorn. Each are transformed into an entirely different way of being.

It’s easy to laud this analogy when discussing these physical form examples but it is a bit more rigorous when it comes to defining transformation in consciousness. Who among us hasn’t had dozens of epiphanies, been handheld to the banks of metamorphosis only to pull a Lot’s wife backwards glance and revert back to what’s familiar?


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The Demands of Transformation

Peace is felt in an atmosphere of surrender.
An atmosphere of surrender is available through letting go of the conventional.
Letting go the conventional requires the understanding that there are far more options available to consider than what you've seen modeled by others.
The risk of being labeled foolish will actually nurture peace in your heart.
Playing it safe will not.


I realize that to be in integrity with the demands of transformation within myself, I must risk looking foolish as well as risk other’s judgments and the accompanying feelings of abandonment. Although these human responses can be expected, it is never easy to witness or experience.

My one blazing goal as a teacher and coach is to bridge you from a certain level of thinking to another – to open you up – to show you through example and ability how these spiritual principles that we espouse are modeled and manifested through practice. It is nurturing free from coddling. My nurturing...

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The Nucleus of All Life

There is a sustaining energy that is the nucleus of all livingness. It links everything and everyone.

It is infinite in nature - always has been, always will be.

This energy is personalized in our lives by our willingness to recognize it.  To say that good does not exist for us is perhaps one of our greatest fallacies.  It is self-inflicted disconnection. (Think of yelling at the electrical cord pulled out of the socket for not giving you power.)

By gathering evidence of its absence or forming coalitions to debate its demise only makes its apparent absence seem real.  This nucleus of ever expanding Life is emitted in, as, and through us by continually removing known and unknown barriers of belief to Its existence. It is a reawakening to the pure realization that what we have longed for is already here.  

Think of Divine Order as a see saw partner. It is there when you are down and there when you are up. These seeming up and down human experiences are natural...

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The Collective Migration

We become what we love and who we love shapes what we become. – Saint Clare of Assisi

In a recent airline magazine article, a biologist shared his research on the migration of monarch butterflies and their winter resting place – a forest in the state of Michoacan in Mexico.

It detailed the remarkable sojourn that millions of monarchs make and how climate change challenges are disrupting their flight pattern and overall survival.  Assisted in his research by native guides through the heavily forested region, the author shared a profound experience he observed between a guide and a single butterfly.  Upon discovering a female drowning in a puddle, weak and freezing, the guide held the distressed insect in his hand to provide warmth. Next, he began tenderly feeding the winged beauty by squeezing nectar from a flower into her mouth.

The butterfly drank the contents of four flowers, regained her strength and flittered away.

Being an available channel for...

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6 Second Moments

A low self-image is usually not based on fact but on mismanaged memory. – Orrin Woodward

The phone rang in the middle of the night. It was the Veterans Administration Hospital calling to inform my mother that my father had passed away. I was 7 and where I slept and where the phone was located were in close proximity. After my mother received the news, she began calling family members and made the comment, “What am I suppose to do with a 7-year-old boy?” Overhearing that, I processed her words to mean I was a burden.

That one comment, when uttered, lasted all of 6 seconds, but my decision to let it define who I thought I was lasted for decades.

I often use this example to show the power of what I call 6 Second Moments – a few seconds worth of words from another which can have the power to shape our identity and what we feel we are capable of for the entirety of our lives.

In adulthood, that memory came flooding back and I realized how I had loyally lived out...

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The Mule Rule

You cannot perceive beauty but with a serene mind. – Henry David Thoreau

 The Mule Rule

 A mule is the offspring of a female horse and a male donkey. A horse has 64 chromosomes and a donkey 62. The mule has 63. This one chromosome change has a strong influence on the general character traits of the mule. Its demeanor is noticeably patient and the animal is extremely intelligent, gathering the best features of its parents. Ranchers will often place a mule among skittish horses in order to bring a sense of calm to the corral.

As humans, we may share the same number of chromosomes, but we do not share a singular character trait. We carry within us the polarity of high strung or calm behavior. The predominant one expressed depends on the one we allow ourselves to choose.

Choosing serenity and calm comes more readily with understanding who we are at the most fundamental level. We are expressions of the Divine. The degree in which that divinity expresses as us on an...

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